I remember when I was in year 6, I was really overweight. (Obese really). I was 87 Kg.

I have spent a lot of time ashamed of my weight and my eating pattern. It was almost like a positive feedback loop.

I'd think, there is no point trying to lose weight because I won't. So I didn't try.

At some point, I shot up to around 110 Kg.

By year 11, I was 100 Kg.

There was a point where I avoided looking at myself in the mirror. I felt hideous.

Then around this or last year, I was at 95 Kg.

After starting Uni, I have started to be less conscious about my weight and the way I look. I am eating better so I feel good. I am not exercising as much, but the change in my eating has been so drastic, that my lack of exercise doesn't make me feel too bad.

When I went home for week 5, my mum told me I had lost weight and I was like, mum, you are lying to me. I look at myself in the mirror everyday and I have seen no such thing.

Only, I have noticed that my 'school' trousers are a bit too big for me and they used to be an exact fit.

I got a bit confused. Like, how is this happening, because I have not lost any weight?

Only, I went to someones house today and they had a scale. I took the opportunity to step on it.

From the last time I stepped on a scale, I have lost weight. I didn't even realise.

I am now 85 Kg.

I checked my BMI. This is bad, but since I have been in year 6, I have been obese according to the BMI scale.

And now, I am not. :)

It feels great because this is the lightest I've been for 8 ish years.

I feel so motivated to lose weight now. To actually get more exercise.

I have got to grips with eating healthily and now I need to get more exercise.

I thought I'd make a whole list about this because weight is something that I hate to discuss.

It makes me feel so vulnerable and ugly. I feel like Shrek or the beast in Beauty in the beast. Only they find love and I feel like I never will. (This is when I talk about weight).

I feel better now.

My target for my next birthday is to lose 10 Kg.

If I do that, according to my BMI, I will be normal weighted.

That's so exciting!