It was so awkward. I stayed on the 182 to Harrow and Wealdstone station and then I got a bus back to Harrow bus station. I went to top up my oyster card and as I walked out, I was walking and besides me this man was walking and I looked to my side because I think, he must have said something and it turns out that is is Mr Malone. We are walking down the stairs, side by said and I am thinking, oh no, we are both heading college, the same direction and I did not want to like awkwardly make conversation. I guess he must have figured this because he said, 'anyway bye, see you at college and he turned and walked through the recreation ground.
I had a Psychology lesson. Guess who was the only student in the class - again? Me. I got lost. At first I went canteen, then I went B207 and then I went B103 where as there was an exam in my usual class and it said go to B103. It was passing by nine slowly and Mike had not passed me. Then he called and asked where was I? It was funny and awkward because I am like, who is this and he is like Mike and I am thinking, Mike actually knows how to use a phone and he is calling me, okay, that is weird. Then he told me to go back to B206 and then we went B203.
He put a pile of cut up sheets in front of me, of 4 different colours and I stared at it and he was like 'Go on then' and I did not want to sound stupid, so I did not ask what to do. I worked out it was a puzzle and put them together and then read it. Then Mike asked me questions about it. I was like thinking, please do not ask questions - I didn't read through it properly. Like I never knew he would quiz me!
I go on sometimes about how much I love Mike - as a person, because he is quite inspiring - but like, being in a room with him for like one and a half hours is like far too much.
Like I even learnt stuff about him. He had unipolar depression but it was not that he had a really low mood for a long time, but that he lost interest in things that he used to like. He complains about his memory not being like it used to and said that he annoys himself. It's sort of funny. Like one minute we are learning Psychology and the next he talks about his life. he has never mentioned marriage or children before.
He talked to me about this study that was investigating if being lonely and having a low self esteem made you depressed, but actually found the people found that it did not cause you to be depressed, but rather more that is something horrible like your pet died - River Rain Hanne Welch is a rock therefore immortal - and you are lonely and have a low self esteem, you are more likely to become depressed.
He told me to watch a Saplosky talking about Depression and Scizophrenia - Mike loves this guys lectures. He is a lecturer at Stanford University and teaches about Psychology and specializes in monkey behavior. I did and it was interesting. He said that majorly depressed people tend to wake up very early rather than late. The tend to not do things because it seems to require a lot of energy to them. Like, oh, I will not go to meet my friend - not because I cannot, but because I have to get up, get dressed, look in the mirror, bath, etc and that is all way too demanding. Mike made a good point. He said I (directing to me) am unlikely to get schizophrenia or go anorexic. I am unlikely to develop a phobia. However, I am very likely to have unipolar depression or know someone who does because it is an endemic now - like the common flu. He said it was probably worst than other illnesses that cause pain because you may come out of the other side, stronger and sort of happy that it happened because it made you a better person, however depression takes what makes you yourself and what makes you happy and it steals it. Think about it - your interest and personality are what make you you. I mean, other people may not draw scenes of doctor who with faceless people; other people may not be so dedicated to Fan fiction like Zeinab or they may not collect rocks and shells like Agata. These things make them not just another face in the crowd, but special and different - though I hate using the word different now, to describe people. Imagine if all the things that you saw that made people special and unique was just gone and then they became just an obscure figure in a grey cloud. No colour or identity either. Nothing to say, oh yeah, this is this person and they are unique ans special because ------.
I am sort of excited for Clinical Psychology next year. :)
I had a Psychology lesson. Guess who was the only student in the class - again? Me. I got lost. At first I went canteen, then I went B207 and then I went B103 where as there was an exam in my usual class and it said go to B103. It was passing by nine slowly and Mike had not passed me. Then he called and asked where was I? It was funny and awkward because I am like, who is this and he is like Mike and I am thinking, Mike actually knows how to use a phone and he is calling me, okay, that is weird. Then he told me to go back to B206 and then we went B203.
He put a pile of cut up sheets in front of me, of 4 different colours and I stared at it and he was like 'Go on then' and I did not want to sound stupid, so I did not ask what to do. I worked out it was a puzzle and put them together and then read it. Then Mike asked me questions about it. I was like thinking, please do not ask questions - I didn't read through it properly. Like I never knew he would quiz me!
I go on sometimes about how much I love Mike - as a person, because he is quite inspiring - but like, being in a room with him for like one and a half hours is like far too much.
Like I even learnt stuff about him. He had unipolar depression but it was not that he had a really low mood for a long time, but that he lost interest in things that he used to like. He complains about his memory not being like it used to and said that he annoys himself. It's sort of funny. Like one minute we are learning Psychology and the next he talks about his life. he has never mentioned marriage or children before.
He talked to me about this study that was investigating if being lonely and having a low self esteem made you depressed, but actually found the people found that it did not cause you to be depressed, but rather more that is something horrible like your pet died - River Rain Hanne Welch is a rock therefore immortal - and you are lonely and have a low self esteem, you are more likely to become depressed.
He told me to watch a Saplosky talking about Depression and Scizophrenia - Mike loves this guys lectures. He is a lecturer at Stanford University and teaches about Psychology and specializes in monkey behavior. I did and it was interesting. He said that majorly depressed people tend to wake up very early rather than late. The tend to not do things because it seems to require a lot of energy to them. Like, oh, I will not go to meet my friend - not because I cannot, but because I have to get up, get dressed, look in the mirror, bath, etc and that is all way too demanding. Mike made a good point. He said I (directing to me) am unlikely to get schizophrenia or go anorexic. I am unlikely to develop a phobia. However, I am very likely to have unipolar depression or know someone who does because it is an endemic now - like the common flu. He said it was probably worst than other illnesses that cause pain because you may come out of the other side, stronger and sort of happy that it happened because it made you a better person, however depression takes what makes you yourself and what makes you happy and it steals it. Think about it - your interest and personality are what make you you. I mean, other people may not draw scenes of doctor who with faceless people; other people may not be so dedicated to Fan fiction like Zeinab or they may not collect rocks and shells like Agata. These things make them not just another face in the crowd, but special and different - though I hate using the word different now, to describe people. Imagine if all the things that you saw that made people special and unique was just gone and then they became just an obscure figure in a grey cloud. No colour or identity either. Nothing to say, oh yeah, this is this person and they are unique ans special because ------.
I am sort of excited for Clinical Psychology next year. :)
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